THE LIGHT BULB JOKE LIST
Collected by Cheryl Green, all written by people with disabilities and Disabled people

● How many disabled people does it take to change a light bulb? It’s people with a disability.
● How many disabled people does it take to change a light bulb? 5 years of litigation to see if changing a light bulb is actually a daily life activity under the ADA
● One, if the person has cerebral palsy (or Parkinson’s). But you’d better buy a few hundred replacements bulbs just in case.
● How many little people does it take to change a light bulb? Don’t go there.
● How many blind people does it take to change a light bulb? It doesn’t really matter, does it? Save your money. Buy a six pack instead.
● How many disabled people does it take to change a light bulb? Deaf people aren’t disabled.
● How many disabled people does it take to change a light bulb? I can do it all by myself because I’m handi-capable!
● One with a Learning Disability to do it and 5 wheelchair users to tell them they are doing it wrong.
● Congress hasn’t fully funded disabled people and light bulbs since 1975 (IDEA reference)
● One to change it and 5 able-bodied people to tell them they are an inspiration. At least one of them will pray for that one, and another one will confess that he donated to a charity for *the Cure*, expecting thanks at such a noble gesture.
● Don’t change the light bulb. Have Jerry Lewis raise money for rehabilitating the light bulb by calling it half a light bulb.
● How many people with ADHD does it take to… Huh? Yeah, I think I have some change in my wallet….
● How many autistic people does it take to change a light bulb? 1, but you better do it yourself unless you want a detailed monologue on the history of light bulbs and their production first.
● How many autistic people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Are you talking about autism parents? Autism parents can do anything!
● How many dyslexic people does it take to change a light bulb?
It depends how quickly the first three realize they are turning it in the wrong direction!!
● How many little people does it take to change a light bulb? The same as the number of average size people it takes. What the hell are you doing with that camera?
● Why do you assume I want my light bulb changed? Ask me. I’M SITTING RIGHT HERE.
● People with disabilities have light bulbs? Aww. It’s so wonderful that they can live normal lives like the rest of us.
● You look like you might have a disability. Here, let me change the light bulb for you.
● I’m going to need documentation of your disability before I can let you change that light bulb.
● Have you checked the light bulb to see if it meets the principles for Universal Design?
● You can change the light bulb, but your service animal has to stay outside.
● Excuse me, ma’am? We have a special seating section for disabled light bulb changers. Right this way….
● I’m sorry, but both of the spots we reserve for light bulb changers with a disability are already occupied by other light bulb changers with a disability. You can wait here until a spot becomes available, and then our capable staff will assist you in changing your light bulb.
● How many people with a brain injury does it take to change a light bulb? Urm…wait, hang on…I know this….
● How many depressed people does it take to change a light bulb? It doesn’t matter. Everything will always be dark forever.
● How many kids with ADD does it take to change a light bulb? Let’s go ride bikes!